They Cleaned Up

When discussing America’s entrepreneurial aristocracy we often use the term “nouveaux riches” and contrast it with the concept of “old money.” The old money families are the really rich folks. I am familiar with only a few names in that category such as the Duponts, the Vanderbilts, the Astors, the Winchesters, and a few others. They all have one thing in common: they cleaned up.

The Winchesters did it with the “rifle that conquered the West.”  God knows how many people were killed by that infernal weapon. The Duponts supplied the gun powder. The Astors got rich by cruelly slaughtering innocent little animals. But there is a path to the brighter side of the story. As a proud Californian I am happy to report that it leads nowhere else but to Pasadena. There is one family, the Gambles who,  while they also cleaned up,  at least used soap to get rich.  And nobody ever died of being washed.

I never found out what the Proctors had to do with it. I must visit the Gamble House again one day. (4, Westmoreland Place, Pasadena, CA 911o3) I hope the curators will not tell me anything shocking.

Pardon My French

I often wondered how it is that the French can talk French so fast. The language breaks my tongue even at my slow pace. Here is the answer, maybe: they skip unessential consonants and nouns and call that elision.

Instead of haricots verts, emphasizing the cots and the verts, a Frenchman says arico ver. The former Parisian central market was called Les Halles. When spoken, the name sounds like Laeh All. The pronoun Je is often shortened to J’ and the negative ne becomes n’ and esses are chopped off. The phrase Je ne sais pas becomes jnsaipa. Commdabitudilsnetaitpasouvenudelaffair diersoir. No Frenchman in his right mind would want to spell this out: comme d’habitude il ne s’etait souvenu de l’affaire de hier soire. Takes too long.

The miracle is that they understand each other. I will now set up my metronome and practice a few French phrases at increasing speeds. My French friends will understand me. All others will be impressed by my fluency. I hope they will not ask me what I said because at that speed I cannot even understand myself.